I was very upset today. My current weight is 169 pounds. This is the heaviest I have ever been in my life and I can't tell you how dissapointed I am in myself about it. It's very discouraging to think that I have allowed myself to get in this position. When I ask myself, why? The only reason I can think of is pure laziness. I have a fiancee who loves me and my body, who encourages me and supports me and thinks I look beautiful exactly how I am. I let myself use that as excuse for a while. "Just be happy with yourself the way you are!" I would say. Well, I know that I am not happy with me the way I look right now. I know that if I just asserted a little effort on a daily basis, I would fit better in my clothes and feel more comforable in my skin. If your weight is something that concerns you all the time, enough to feel like you could do better if only you tried, it's time to start doing something about it. And yes, I am sure all of you know I have a wedding coming up. It's not about that. It's about me and how I want to be, and being the best version of myself that I can be, mentally, spiritually and physically.
The one true motivator in my life is accountability, to myself and others. I want to make myself accountable to my goals and want others to help me in my goals as well. Even though I never thought of myself as competitive, I really am. But I compete against myself. So, I need your encouraging words as I start this journey. I am going to journal, every day, my thoughts about how I am feeling, what I am eating, and when I am working out. Hopefully, this will help keep me accountable to myself and get to looking the way I know I want to look.
Current Weight: 169
Goal Weight: 145
Total weight loss goal: 24 pounds
Goal Date: 120 days from now
How will I do this:
Drink at least 2 liters of water per day.
Cut down sodas to 2 per week.
Cut down calories to 1,800 per day.
Do at least 45 minutes of physical activity 5 times a week.
Today will be my first test. I have been drinking alot of water today and had only one small glass of diet soda. However, we had pizza in today for a team meeting, and I caved in to the temptation and had two large slices. Of course, this was before my trip to the scale. This evening, I am very much looking forward to going to the track and having a walk/run to get the heart pumping! I seem to do better when I have music playing, so I am taking my iPod and getting myself active. As tempting as it is tonight to go home, get on the couch, eat, and watch Dancing with the Stars, I will not allow myself to do that until I get in some sort of physical activity. In the morning, I will be doing some pilates before work!
Super proud of you girl! If you ever want a running partner in the evening give me a call. I try to run Mon-wed in the evening. Me and the boyfriend have started hiking on the weekends to change it up a little bit since he hates running. Me and Steph I think have the same Pilate's video as you do. It for sure shows how inflexible I have become. Good luck with your journey. I know you can do it! The bigger your support system the easier it seems to lose. I have tons of support with Steph and in the 2+ years I have lived with her I have lost almost 50 pounds! :-) Now I have Derek who as your Jason does loves me just the way I am but is super supportive as I become even better for myself!
ReplyDelete